It is ok to stop visiting a person with dementia just becouse he is angry all the time; he is 89 year old?!
Question: It is ok to stop visiting a person with dementia just becouse he is angry all the time; he is 89 year old.?
his wife every time visit him at the facility is very sad becouse of his behavior,she feel guilty of his severe dementia and she dont know if keep visiting him.Health Question & Answer
Answers:
You can only do what you can do. ESPECIALLY dealing with dementia, you can "shoulda" yourself to death.
I am sure his wife feels guilty because she feels visiting is something she must do. But there are people like geriatric care managers who can handle SOME of the visits, and there are medications, such as seroquel, that may alleviate some of the symptoms.
Try to remember that this is not him; it's the disease, and it's psychologically corrosive. You no more need to be near it when it's bad than you should be around someone who has the flu.
You MUST look after yourself first. Once you've made sure you have gotten the best care you can for this man, the rest just... is.
There's a silver lining: the average number of years a person survives after a diagnosis of dementia is perhaps half a dozen years. In a way, it's a blessing that neither the patient nor the caregiver has to suffer indefinitely.Health Question & Answer
I am sure his wife feels guilty because she feels visiting is something she must do. But there are people like geriatric care managers who can handle SOME of the visits, and there are medications, such as seroquel, that may alleviate some of the symptoms.
Try to remember that this is not him; it's the disease, and it's psychologically corrosive. You no more need to be near it when it's bad than you should be around someone who has the flu.
You MUST look after yourself first. Once you've made sure you have gotten the best care you can for this man, the rest just... is.
There's a silver lining: the average number of years a person survives after a diagnosis of dementia is perhaps half a dozen years. In a way, it's a blessing that neither the patient nor the caregiver has to suffer indefinitely.Health Question & Answer
I'm sure many people in their ignorance will say that it's not okay, and if the person really loved the other person they would continue to visit.
But, unfortunately, sometimes it just is no longer a workable situation and the visits have to stop or become rather less frequent. It's very sad.
It doesn't mean that they've stopped loving each other, it's just something sometimes is for the best.Health Question & Answer
But, unfortunately, sometimes it just is no longer a workable situation and the visits have to stop or become rather less frequent. It's very sad.
It doesn't mean that they've stopped loving each other, it's just something sometimes is for the best.Health Question & Answer
Ignore the first poster,
It isn't her fault that he is like that, Time just has that affect on some people. I have dealt with a few cases of dementia first hand and it is extremely hard on everyone in the family, and everyone around that person.
I would go see him still, But stay very limited, If she/you don't, although he may be mean, you'll regret not going when he is gone, even if he isn't who he used to be, a part of him is still there.Health Question & Answer
It isn't her fault that he is like that, Time just has that affect on some people. I have dealt with a few cases of dementia first hand and it is extremely hard on everyone in the family, and everyone around that person.
I would go see him still, But stay very limited, If she/you don't, although he may be mean, you'll regret not going when he is gone, even if he isn't who he used to be, a part of him is still there.Health Question & Answer
First, I would say that it is okay to limit visits or stop them altogether if the visitor becomes the target of physical or emotional abuse.
Second, I would suggest seeing a different doctor than the facility doctor. It may be that the his anger and other symptoms could be better controlled with a different medication regimen.
I think it's worth a try.Health Question & Answer
Second, I would suggest seeing a different doctor than the facility doctor. It may be that the his anger and other symptoms could be better controlled with a different medication regimen.
I think it's worth a try.Health Question & Answer
Obviously, the first answerer has never been through a situation such as this. If that person no longer knows who you are, and he is hostile, then I feel it is up to the loved one whether to continue to visit, and no one else has the right to judge them. It's not like they are leaving him at a busy intersection in downtown Detroit, or at the movie theater. They are leaving him in the care of trained professionals. Health Question & Answer
Oh God Love his Soul. He probably is very angry, 89 and in a "facility" I would be too (sometimes it has to be). If she feels okay not seeing him that is up to her. Just make sure she will be okay if he "full-fills" his life without her. Sometimes the ones they love the most are the ones they are the most angry with. Don't know why it just is. Maybe frustration of knowing there is nothing you can do about the situation. Tell her to love him and tell him so, talk to him about old times, and things of interest. Medication.? to calm him...Maybe he is just sick and tired of being sick and tired.Health Question & Answer
It is important for her to also take care of herself !! I don't know how often she visits ,but perhaps could cut back on visits.It is a hard thing to watch and I think if her husband was aware he would understand her not coming.If they had a good relationship, he would want her to be happy. BUT this is a choice she has to make on her own...Just be sure to keep telling her she needs to take care of herselfHealth Question & Answer
you shouldn't even be asking that.
love is love is love is love. it stops when someone becomes ill.?
has society become so throw away that we now include people.?
Health Question & Answer
love is love is love is love. it stops when someone becomes ill.?
has society become so throw away that we now include people.?
Health Question & Answer