Has anyone got any advice on how to deal with being treated this way in your local community?!


Question: Has anyone got any advice on how to deal with being treated this way in your local community.?
now just to say ive experienced this behavior by people in my local community for many years and im not fully understood as to why, ive dealt with it by carrying on oblivious and just ignoring it , but it makes me angry because its not like ive commited a crime against humanity.

people giving me lingering looks, stares, glances , being aloof, condescending, stand offish , and abrupt with me , mind games, people saying things within earshot that i feel are insinuated at me.

im mixed race hispanic , but look white, i have very light skin and blue eyes but just before at the supermarket , some mother in the next checkout, said to her daughter ' shes a little monkey arnt you .? '.
i honestly feel outcasted as i have done for all these years like people are trying to undermine me, provoke me, get a rise out of me etc.

i have bpd and ptsd due to a very tough, traumatic life of abuse and bein victimized , many years ago i used to have rage outbursts where id lose control of conduct in public, but ive controlled and improved it for years.....been seeking help...have insight....am aware of my problems etc.

i have a criminal past 8 years ago, been in the loony bin but im trying to put my past behind me, reform myself and achieve my goals....as i have done for years..

yes iam still aloof when i go out , but not in a nasty aggressive way, its more of a defense mechanism, more of a front to the world to keep the world out, i mind my own business, control mybehaviorr , control the rage , do my best. do my grocery shopping, pay bills, do what i have to do..

yet , i still experience thisbehaviorr by people in britain, i live in a mainly white area in my own apartment for 5 years now, my only goal is to leave the uk, move abroad to hot climates, near the coast. get a job 1st though in IT.

im starting to grow inpatient now, with this stoopid behavior that i cant understand : funny over familiar, lingering looks , words withing earshot like '' monkey '' - aloofbehaviorr, folks looking at me like im being '' watched '' - almost making me feel like a notorious criminal.

now im nor exaggerating thisbehaviorr or imagining it, im harming no one , only trying to live my life and achieve my goal - i dont wanna lose it because then that plays into their hands, because i think they want that reaction.

and they aint gettin that from me.

so how do i handle it .?

please with all respect can i have serious answers, iam not delusional or paranoid - plus im not going to submit to theirbehaviorr like its me who has the problem, because im doing nothin wrong, and im not about to feel guilty for something ive not done.Health Question & Answer


Answers:
The fact that you are taking care of business says a lot about you. you are doing your best. You are strong. Don't feel that you have to please the world. the hell with them. You can do it on your own. Don't let the stares bother you. Sometimes we just think that we know people's thoughts. When it is probably not at all the way we are thinking. You have done nothing wrong , so just keep yourself strong and in control.Health Question & Answer

you spend far too much time thinking that everything said in your hearing is all about you, you ARE paranoid.
you also have a lousy self image, and that feeds into the paranoia.
if you aren't getting counselling, I suggest you do so.Health Question & Answer



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