My job is really stressing me out to the point of suicide. should I quit a good paying job or hang in there?!
Question: My job is really stressing me out to the point of suicide. should I quit a good paying job or hang in there.?
I mean, I work in one of the biggest companies in my state and like I am really stressed out and I don't know. The pay and benefits are really good, but the work is not hard, it's just there's just too much work to be done and I am always behind in progress and there is not enough help, and my boss is getting on my case of my lack of progress and he's threatening me that my quarterly performance evaluation is coming up and I am just , I don't know, help please thank youHealth Question & Answer
Answers:
There comes a time in everyone's life when you need to ask yourself one question: "Am I content where I am, or do I have the courage and drive to really pursue what I want in life.?"
Each one of us can find the good paying job with good benefits. We can all go to college and get a computer engineering, medical, or law degree. We can all do that...it's just a matter of time and energy. But not everyone does. There are other jobs out there, and if you don't really have a goal in life, or if your goal is to be a good person and raise a good family, then it doesn't really matter WHAT job you have. For some people, a job is part of that goal, so regardless of the pay, they go out and find that job.
No matter what your job is, you need to be able to handle stress. That's your problem. If you can't handle stress here, what makes you think a new career choice will magically fix that inability.? You find another job, you have to meet more deadlines, appease another boss, and you're just as stressed out as when you started.
I've worked a few jobs in my lifetime. One of which I was a draftswoman in an office with good pay and benefits, another of which was my enlistment in the Marine Corps. Both of which have their individual stresses, and here's how I dealt with them.
1. Make a list, check it twice. Being behind in progress and not having enough help is really too bad, but you've gotta buck up, put out, and get the job done. Mission accomplishment is your goal. After all, the sooner you get done, the sooner you can put it behind you. Make a list of all the projects that need to be done today, this week, next week, the week after, and the week after (so a month's plan). Have them written up and next to your workspace. This way, you can have a plan of attack. Arrange them in order of ease, easiest ones first. This way, you can accomplish projects early in the day and get a boost because you've accomplished something. To show your boss what you're doing, you can give him an update email at the end of the day. I do this at my current job when things get hectic, like before an inspection. This way, my supervisor knows what I've done and this way he knows what doesn't need to be gone over again.
2. Create a "thinkspace" or "meditationspace," not a "workspace." Even in my 3 person cubicle, I had a small area that was just mine. There, I placed a small plant and I listened to my music. I cleaned the clutter each morning, but I recommend doing it before you leave work so you can start fresh the next day. This way, you aren't visually overwhelmed by the papers and other crap laying around. Have everything nice and organized. This will also give your boss a quick visual to see what you've done throughout the day to show that yes, you are working! Make sure your list is in sight as well.
3. Take a break...for working out. On your lunch hour, hit the gym. Eat at your desk afterwards. Exercising is a fabulous way to manage stress, and you get the added bonus of health! If your company doesn't have a gym, you can always try exercising before or after work. I like doing it in the middle of work because it's a nice way to break up the monotony. Do some squats, lunges, push-ups, dips, and ab workouts right in your workspace. You can even bring one of those large exercise balls to work and replace your chair with it to help work your core even more. Have a dumbbell or two in your desk so you can do your upper body even better. If you can't eat after lunch, keep it quick...you can do a good few runs of a circuit in about 15 minutes! Don't forget to take regular breaks, too. Every hour or so, take the long way to the bathroom, if there is one. If you're allowed a smoke break, take one and walk around the building instead of smoking (if the building is HUUUUUGE, then just walk around the parking lot and come back). This small change will get the blood moving and help re-energize you.
4. Eat well. Make sure you are well nourished, and I don't mean "well fed." Cut processed food out of your diet. At night, cook for yourself. It can be quite therapeutic, and you get the added benefit of knowing that you have a healthy meal ready to go not only tonight, but for lunch tomorrow by making too much food. Another option is to make too much food, then to change it up the next day. This way, you get to feel creative instead of like another cog in the wheel. Especially if you have a family or even just a roommate or a friend to invite over, you can bless someone by putting good food in their bellies.
5. Think about how to improve/accomplish, but don't worry. Worrying is a waste. You can't fix it, so why worry.? No reason. It's just more stress.
6. Cut off the boss. When your boss checks up on you, YOU start the conversation. Here's what I did: "Hi, [name]! Long day, right.? Well, I got some stuff taken care of. [motion towards "completed" box] One project was had a little snag [explain snag], but then I [explain solution], so that's all taken care of. How are you doing.?"Health Question & Answer
Each one of us can find the good paying job with good benefits. We can all go to college and get a computer engineering, medical, or law degree. We can all do that...it's just a matter of time and energy. But not everyone does. There are other jobs out there, and if you don't really have a goal in life, or if your goal is to be a good person and raise a good family, then it doesn't really matter WHAT job you have. For some people, a job is part of that goal, so regardless of the pay, they go out and find that job.
No matter what your job is, you need to be able to handle stress. That's your problem. If you can't handle stress here, what makes you think a new career choice will magically fix that inability.? You find another job, you have to meet more deadlines, appease another boss, and you're just as stressed out as when you started.
I've worked a few jobs in my lifetime. One of which I was a draftswoman in an office with good pay and benefits, another of which was my enlistment in the Marine Corps. Both of which have their individual stresses, and here's how I dealt with them.
1. Make a list, check it twice. Being behind in progress and not having enough help is really too bad, but you've gotta buck up, put out, and get the job done. Mission accomplishment is your goal. After all, the sooner you get done, the sooner you can put it behind you. Make a list of all the projects that need to be done today, this week, next week, the week after, and the week after (so a month's plan). Have them written up and next to your workspace. This way, you can have a plan of attack. Arrange them in order of ease, easiest ones first. This way, you can accomplish projects early in the day and get a boost because you've accomplished something. To show your boss what you're doing, you can give him an update email at the end of the day. I do this at my current job when things get hectic, like before an inspection. This way, my supervisor knows what I've done and this way he knows what doesn't need to be gone over again.
2. Create a "thinkspace" or "meditationspace," not a "workspace." Even in my 3 person cubicle, I had a small area that was just mine. There, I placed a small plant and I listened to my music. I cleaned the clutter each morning, but I recommend doing it before you leave work so you can start fresh the next day. This way, you aren't visually overwhelmed by the papers and other crap laying around. Have everything nice and organized. This will also give your boss a quick visual to see what you've done throughout the day to show that yes, you are working! Make sure your list is in sight as well.
3. Take a break...for working out. On your lunch hour, hit the gym. Eat at your desk afterwards. Exercising is a fabulous way to manage stress, and you get the added bonus of health! If your company doesn't have a gym, you can always try exercising before or after work. I like doing it in the middle of work because it's a nice way to break up the monotony. Do some squats, lunges, push-ups, dips, and ab workouts right in your workspace. You can even bring one of those large exercise balls to work and replace your chair with it to help work your core even more. Have a dumbbell or two in your desk so you can do your upper body even better. If you can't eat after lunch, keep it quick...you can do a good few runs of a circuit in about 15 minutes! Don't forget to take regular breaks, too. Every hour or so, take the long way to the bathroom, if there is one. If you're allowed a smoke break, take one and walk around the building instead of smoking (if the building is HUUUUUGE, then just walk around the parking lot and come back). This small change will get the blood moving and help re-energize you.
4. Eat well. Make sure you are well nourished, and I don't mean "well fed." Cut processed food out of your diet. At night, cook for yourself. It can be quite therapeutic, and you get the added benefit of knowing that you have a healthy meal ready to go not only tonight, but for lunch tomorrow by making too much food. Another option is to make too much food, then to change it up the next day. This way, you get to feel creative instead of like another cog in the wheel. Especially if you have a family or even just a roommate or a friend to invite over, you can bless someone by putting good food in their bellies.
5. Think about how to improve/accomplish, but don't worry. Worrying is a waste. You can't fix it, so why worry.? No reason. It's just more stress.
6. Cut off the boss. When your boss checks up on you, YOU start the conversation. Here's what I did: "Hi, [name]! Long day, right.? Well, I got some stuff taken care of. [motion towards "completed" box] One project was had a little snag [explain snag], but then I [explain solution], so that's all taken care of. How are you doing.?"Health Question & Answer
Well I honestly do not know what you should do. Because you have a good easy job that you just cant handle. I understand your boss, but if you can, suggest a partner or some one else to help with you. But if not you might need to quit. But before you make that decision consider this, the economy is terrible now, hundreds of thousands of jobs were lost this summer alone. You are one of the fortunate ones who have a job. On top of that you have great pay and benefits. Millions of people would love to be in your position, no matter how overwhelming it is. But the emotional stress might not be worth it!!Health Question & Answer
Nothing is worth taking your life over. If you have already spoken with your boss and discussed the pressure you are feeling; perhaps it's time to find another position.
also, ask yourself and try to be honest with yourself: why are you always behind in your work, are you truly giving it your ALL. also, are you happy in your personal life.? Many times other things can affect our performance in whatever we do.
I sincerely hope you figure things out, God bless.Health Question & Answer
also, ask yourself and try to be honest with yourself: why are you always behind in your work, are you truly giving it your ALL. also, are you happy in your personal life.? Many times other things can affect our performance in whatever we do.
I sincerely hope you figure things out, God bless.Health Question & Answer
First... sit down with your boss and go over your workload. Ask him what your priorities should be, and how to handle the everything. See if you can solve your problem proactively.
If that doesn't work, perhaps you can switch jobs within your company.
Otherwise, time to start looking. The stress is not worth it! Been there, done that. I quit a job with nothing in place because it just got too me too much. Eventually I ended up in a better place, and now I'm in a MUCH better place.
Good luck!Health Question & Answer
If that doesn't work, perhaps you can switch jobs within your company.
Otherwise, time to start looking. The stress is not worth it! Been there, done that. I quit a job with nothing in place because it just got too me too much. Eventually I ended up in a better place, and now I'm in a MUCH better place.
Good luck!Health Question & Answer
If you're not happy there and there's no way to work it out with your boss, quit and find a job that you enjoy. A job isn't only about pay and benefits. What good are they, if you're stressed, depressed, sick, and dread going to work.? Your life and health a worth a lot more. You'll find something that works for you. Good luck!Health Question & Answer
Maybe before quitting you can try seeing a counselor who may be able help you with ways to de-stress and/or put things in perspective. it can also help just to have someone to talk to. But maybe in the end it just isn't the right lifestyle for you. Health Question & Answer
Only you can decide that ! like the above said whats more important money or your life. Don't live to work work to live i say! Find or get training in a job you would feel more comftable and happier in ! Health Question & Answer
Honestly it's about your health.
Suicide is a huge thing, you have to be completely distraught to even think about it.
Your job isn't worth that crap to put it bluntly.
find something to make you happy. Health Question & Answer
Suicide is a huge thing, you have to be completely distraught to even think about it.
Your job isn't worth that crap to put it bluntly.
find something to make you happy. Health Question & Answer
Pretty much everyone who has answered above me is right to some degree. Besides, money is no good to you if you're dead, right.? Health Question & Answer
Thats a personal question only you can answer.
Whats more important, money or life.
Its as simple as that. Health Question & Answer
Whats more important, money or life.
Its as simple as that. Health Question & Answer
Screw the system. Write some novels and get paid. Smoke weed at your computer whilst you think up the NY Times best sellers. Live in a CA mansion by the ocean. Health Question & Answer
Find yourself another good paying job with good benefits and less stressful. Health Question & Answer
No job is worth ruining your serenity over...Health Question & Answer
talk to him about itHealth Question & Answer
So what is it about this that you would be running from....the opinion of your boss in the quarterly performance evaluation...fear of failure and caring too much about what they think....
Or is it the lack of progress you see in your job.? Are you someone who would be best in a job with set agendas and the ability to clear your desk at the end of every day.?
Do you need to let your boss know that you don't believe the workload is right for you and let them know of your situation...if they are not interested in worker morale, then is it really a workplace worth making money for.? Because that is what you are doing....are they worth it.?
Whatever this is for you, you will take into the next job anyway, because it is not the job in the end you are running from, it is the feelings your are having that you can't stand.
Negotiate, you do have power, you have a track record with them, and you would be surprised what you can work out if you stand up for yourself...use this situation to grow, not run.
Hang in there....
Mel
Health Question & Answer
Or is it the lack of progress you see in your job.? Are you someone who would be best in a job with set agendas and the ability to clear your desk at the end of every day.?
Do you need to let your boss know that you don't believe the workload is right for you and let them know of your situation...if they are not interested in worker morale, then is it really a workplace worth making money for.? Because that is what you are doing....are they worth it.?
Whatever this is for you, you will take into the next job anyway, because it is not the job in the end you are running from, it is the feelings your are having that you can't stand.
Negotiate, you do have power, you have a track record with them, and you would be surprised what you can work out if you stand up for yourself...use this situation to grow, not run.
Hang in there....
Mel
Health Question & Answer
See stress treatments, at ezy build, below, in section 42. A certain level of stress is unavoidable, in modern society, so it is a good idea to develop effective coping methods. For others, or yourself: A massage (at least neck and shoulders) with jasmine, lavender, juniper, and/or bergamot, or German chamomile essential oils added to the massage oil, and to a warm bath, preferably beforehand, to help make any tension knots and muscles more pliant (they may only want, say, a juniper and/or bergamot and/or sandalwood mix: check first). I am aware of advice that strong heat, applied to essential oils can damage them, and so I would not use a diffuser.
also consider anise, basil, bay, eucalyptus, peppermint, rose, and thyme. Place some pieces of rock salt in a small vial, then add a few drops of the oil of your choice (the rock salt absorbs the oil and is less risky to carry around than a bottle of oil). Open the vial and breathe in the scent whenever you need a quick stress release. See if they will do long, stretching yoga exercises, or t'ai chi with you (see section 2, at ezy build, below).
Practise daily, one of the relaxation techniques on pages 2, 11, 2c, or 2i; whichever works best for you, but the mindfulness breathing for 15 - 20 mns is ideal, although the progressive muscle relaxation can be learned quickly, and takes only several minutes, if pressed for time. Repeat: "I feel calm" and/or "I can handle this." Employ the EFT version for use in public, for which you can reasonably claim that you have a headache, as you massage/tap your temples, but it may be advisable to restrict yourself to subvocalising (saying it to yourself, in your mind, not aloud). Section 53, and pages 2, 2.q and 2.o refer. "Even though I sometimes suffer from stress, I deeply and completely accept myself".
A variant of EMDR: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety, is shown in section 42, on page i. I have found that the 2 - 3 minutes spent using the EMDR markedly reduces distractions to the relaxation process, and is repaid many times over. You can also multitask, using the gazing technique, as you walk/jog or exercise, by focusing on a distant object, or just focus awareness on how each step feels, noting any thoughts which flash across your mind, without pursuing any particular train of thought, just gently redirect your focus to the task at hand.
For some people, it helps to visualise of a quiet, relaxing scene, (Imagine, as vividly as you can, that you are on a tropical beach, reclining comfortably; you luxuriate, as the the sun warms you, and a gentle breeze caresses your skin lightly, inhaling the tangy, sea scented, salt laden spray from the sparkling, translucent, aqua waves, crashing on the white, coral beach sand, and feeling the hot sand slip through your fingers in one hand, sipping your favorite drink with the other; all the while, the seagulls call, swoop and cavort playfully overhead in a cloudless, azure sky: you feel just like one of them, free to soar and cartwheel, or just glide in the moist, heavy air, and that this moment will last forever ... ).
Some people may find it helps when they listen to: http://www.amazon.com/Sounds-Of-The-Ocea... Other suggestions: http://www.secretsofmeditation.com/demo....
and the audio, as well as the printed version, at: http://www.lessons4living.com/relaxation... and http://www.amazon.com/Ambient-Rain-Sound... or the mountain river sounds. Take 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily: (certified free of mercury) it is best if consumed with an antioxidant, such as an orange, or grapefruit, or their FRESHLY SQUEEZED juice. If vitamin E is added, it should be certified as being 100% from natural sources, or it may be synthetic: avoid it.
Ginseng & Lady's Slipper are recommended herbal remedies. Light to moderate daily exercise helps fight stress. http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris Arrive early, eat sandwiches & fruit at your workstation during breaks, and leave late. If you can, do some more at home. See section 26: getting organised & www.mercola.com Time management, procrastination, email, etc.: follow the links, note as you go.Health Question & Answer
also consider anise, basil, bay, eucalyptus, peppermint, rose, and thyme. Place some pieces of rock salt in a small vial, then add a few drops of the oil of your choice (the rock salt absorbs the oil and is less risky to carry around than a bottle of oil). Open the vial and breathe in the scent whenever you need a quick stress release. See if they will do long, stretching yoga exercises, or t'ai chi with you (see section 2, at ezy build, below).
Practise daily, one of the relaxation techniques on pages 2, 11, 2c, or 2i; whichever works best for you, but the mindfulness breathing for 15 - 20 mns is ideal, although the progressive muscle relaxation can be learned quickly, and takes only several minutes, if pressed for time. Repeat: "I feel calm" and/or "I can handle this." Employ the EFT version for use in public, for which you can reasonably claim that you have a headache, as you massage/tap your temples, but it may be advisable to restrict yourself to subvocalising (saying it to yourself, in your mind, not aloud). Section 53, and pages 2, 2.q and 2.o refer. "Even though I sometimes suffer from stress, I deeply and completely accept myself".
A variant of EMDR: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety, is shown in section 42, on page i. I have found that the 2 - 3 minutes spent using the EMDR markedly reduces distractions to the relaxation process, and is repaid many times over. You can also multitask, using the gazing technique, as you walk/jog or exercise, by focusing on a distant object, or just focus awareness on how each step feels, noting any thoughts which flash across your mind, without pursuing any particular train of thought, just gently redirect your focus to the task at hand.
For some people, it helps to visualise of a quiet, relaxing scene, (Imagine, as vividly as you can, that you are on a tropical beach, reclining comfortably; you luxuriate, as the the sun warms you, and a gentle breeze caresses your skin lightly, inhaling the tangy, sea scented, salt laden spray from the sparkling, translucent, aqua waves, crashing on the white, coral beach sand, and feeling the hot sand slip through your fingers in one hand, sipping your favorite drink with the other; all the while, the seagulls call, swoop and cavort playfully overhead in a cloudless, azure sky: you feel just like one of them, free to soar and cartwheel, or just glide in the moist, heavy air, and that this moment will last forever ... ).
Some people may find it helps when they listen to: http://www.amazon.com/Sounds-Of-The-Ocea... Other suggestions: http://www.secretsofmeditation.com/demo....
and the audio, as well as the printed version, at: http://www.lessons4living.com/relaxation... and http://www.amazon.com/Ambient-Rain-Sound... or the mountain river sounds. Take 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily: (certified free of mercury) it is best if consumed with an antioxidant, such as an orange, or grapefruit, or their FRESHLY SQUEEZED juice. If vitamin E is added, it should be certified as being 100% from natural sources, or it may be synthetic: avoid it.
Ginseng & Lady's Slipper are recommended herbal remedies. Light to moderate daily exercise helps fight stress. http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris Arrive early, eat sandwiches & fruit at your workstation during breaks, and leave late. If you can, do some more at home. See section 26: getting organised & www.mercola.com Time management, procrastination, email, etc.: follow the links, note as you go.Health Question & Answer
There was a time when I had this happen to me too. I hated my job, I was making a decent amount of money, but I just didn't want to do it anymore. I hated the people, I hated the job, and I really hated how everyone depended on me.
Then one day I did something I never thought I would. I up and quit. I threw in the towel, and I have been happy ever since. After I quit I didn't go to my dream job, but Health Question & Answer
Then one day I did something I never thought I would. I up and quit. I threw in the towel, and I have been happy ever since. After I quit I didn't go to my dream job, but Health Question & Answer