Is it okay to lie in this situation?!
Question: Is it okay to lie in this situation.?
I have a hard time dealing with stress at home and at school so I've started meeting with psychotherapist. I see her once a week and some of my classmates have been noticing that I've been gone for the first half of a class on Wednesday so they always ask me where I was. I know that they're just curious, but I'm just not that comfortable telling them I'm talking to a teen counselor so I just either tell them it was nothing or I had to talk to my guidance counselor about college. It works for a little while, but then they just keep asking me again because they don't buy my answer. So basically I have no idea what I should tell them.Health Question & Answer
Answers:
You shouldn't reveal anything that your uncomfortable having people know. You are not obligated to let your friends know everything about you. It's really not nice of them to keep pressuring you for an answer. I think it's ok to lie. Maybe you could ask your psychotherapist how to handle it. She's probably dealt with this issue before. Health Question & Answer
Lying always gets you in trouble because it's hard to remember all the details you need to keep up with the lie. But you don't have to reveal anything about your life that is private. You can just say that you don't want to talk about it, or it's private and I'd rather not discuss it. That's the truth.Health Question & Answer
I think that you are absolutely doing the right thing by meeting with a psychotherapist to help you deal with your life stress and that is your business, no one else's. I agree with the other answers about just saying you have a dr.'s appointment or just make it clear that it's private and you'll tell them when you're ready to. Good luck to you!Health Question & Answer
I think it is probably better for you to lie. You just need to come up with an easy and comfortable lie of where you could be going in the first half of the lesson. The more you tell people where you have been regardless of whether it is a lie or not then the more and more likely they are to stop asking you.
Stephen Lloyd.
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Stephen Lloyd.
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For All Your Latest Holiday Deals Just Visit > http://www.holiday-spirit-deals.comHealth Question & Answer
I always say that it is never ok to lie..however in this situation I understand your desire to keep this to yourself. Perhaps you can say that you had a Dr appt or where at the dentist. Health Question & Answer
First off yes, it's ok to lie. No one has to know where you are going. You should just tell them that you are volunteering somewhere in the school and they write you a pass to miss part of that class.Health Question & Answer
don't lie just tell them that it's personal and that it's none of their business.Health Question & Answer
I think the real question is:
Is it okay to preserve my own privacy in this situation.?
The answer is absolutely yes. Everyone needs a zone of privacy in order to keep our sanity. Everyone has the right to have private thoughts. And everyone especially deserves to have -medical- privacy.
You're having trouble lying because:
1. You're an honest person and the stress and self-consciousness shows all over your face. And
2. You're friends are smart.
Having smart friends is a good thing. Not being a good liar . . . is a VERY good thing.
What their real question is is:
"Is everything okay.?"
They want to make sure you're okay and getting all of the proper support you need and not just hiding your misery away.
What I would do the next time someone pesters you, is take their face in your hands, look deep in their eyes, and say:
'Karl, I love you, but I'm FINE. I am getting all the support I need, but it's none of your business, so stop worrying so much. And it means a lot to me that you care about me.'
Then distract them by telling them what's upsetting you.
Then, out of all the ten million things that are upsetting a normal person at any one time, pick some topic that you feel like talking about in front of all your classmates. Like arguments with your parents or something.
In other words, just keep talking about your public life and you don't have to talk about your private life.
I guess there are a lot of people who are doing things in private that they SHOULD talk about, like eating disorders or cutting or drugs or whatever. But that's not the situation here.
You have every right not to talk about doctor's appointments if you don't want to.
You are allowed to tell a white lie, but it might not even be necessary. Sometimes when we lie, our friends think there must be some horrible thing we're hiding, and there isn't.
Health Question & Answer
Is it okay to preserve my own privacy in this situation.?
The answer is absolutely yes. Everyone needs a zone of privacy in order to keep our sanity. Everyone has the right to have private thoughts. And everyone especially deserves to have -medical- privacy.
You're having trouble lying because:
1. You're an honest person and the stress and self-consciousness shows all over your face. And
2. You're friends are smart.
Having smart friends is a good thing. Not being a good liar . . . is a VERY good thing.
What their real question is is:
"Is everything okay.?"
They want to make sure you're okay and getting all of the proper support you need and not just hiding your misery away.
What I would do the next time someone pesters you, is take their face in your hands, look deep in their eyes, and say:
'Karl, I love you, but I'm FINE. I am getting all the support I need, but it's none of your business, so stop worrying so much. And it means a lot to me that you care about me.'
Then distract them by telling them what's upsetting you.
Then, out of all the ten million things that are upsetting a normal person at any one time, pick some topic that you feel like talking about in front of all your classmates. Like arguments with your parents or something.
In other words, just keep talking about your public life and you don't have to talk about your private life.
I guess there are a lot of people who are doing things in private that they SHOULD talk about, like eating disorders or cutting or drugs or whatever. But that's not the situation here.
You have every right not to talk about doctor's appointments if you don't want to.
You are allowed to tell a white lie, but it might not even be necessary. Sometimes when we lie, our friends think there must be some horrible thing we're hiding, and there isn't.
Health Question & Answer
I wouldn't lie. I would just say, I need some privacy on this thing I am working on, please understand. Thank you so much for caring. I'd be real. You know.?
Just say maybe one day I will be able to tell them.
Tell me something friend.... If you were worried or curious about one of your friends and THEY did this and lied to you would you be more upset that they lied to you, OR would you be more understanding if they said... Man I just have something I am working out, you gonna be there for me if I just need some respect and privacy on this a while.? Thanks for caring.
Me personally I HATE being lied to. I understand when people are going through stuff and they feel they have to lie, but I feel less of a friend or HORRIBLE if they feel they can't be real with me and say, there are just some things I need for myself to be private about while I work it out. Then look into their eye and pat them on the back.
THEN if they are REALLY gonna be your friend, they can take that, and they can take it and be a friend for life when you are ready.
If they can't take it now.? Most likely they wouldn't be able to handle the truth if you told them.
Mature or good friends will give you your space and let ya work stuff out AND be there for you when it's time.
Without lying to them.
All the best.
(ps Jacugo, I don't know WHO you are but I feel honored that we know the truth and you came to us here at Yahooville, work out your problems baby best you know how, and it's ok to say, I can't tell you right now, but maybe someday)Health Question & Answer
Just say maybe one day I will be able to tell them.
Tell me something friend.... If you were worried or curious about one of your friends and THEY did this and lied to you would you be more upset that they lied to you, OR would you be more understanding if they said... Man I just have something I am working out, you gonna be there for me if I just need some respect and privacy on this a while.? Thanks for caring.
Me personally I HATE being lied to. I understand when people are going through stuff and they feel they have to lie, but I feel less of a friend or HORRIBLE if they feel they can't be real with me and say, there are just some things I need for myself to be private about while I work it out. Then look into their eye and pat them on the back.
THEN if they are REALLY gonna be your friend, they can take that, and they can take it and be a friend for life when you are ready.
If they can't take it now.? Most likely they wouldn't be able to handle the truth if you told them.
Mature or good friends will give you your space and let ya work stuff out AND be there for you when it's time.
Without lying to them.
All the best.
(ps Jacugo, I don't know WHO you are but I feel honored that we know the truth and you came to us here at Yahooville, work out your problems baby best you know how, and it's ok to say, I can't tell you right now, but maybe someday)Health Question & Answer