How to control.. or manage my feelings?!
Question: How to control.. or manage my feelings.?
I always feel as though something bad is going to happen.
a letter in the mail.. its something bad.. a unpaid bill, a ez-pass violation that i didn't KNOW ABOUT.
I get a call on the phone.. Its some one chewing my @ss for something I didn't do. or someone telling me I have to work for someone else.
i shake. im sleepless.. im a military police officer in the u.s. army.. Any help from a civilian .. advice or such to help me relax.. and don't tell me to breathe.. G.D. I"M TIRED of being told to breathe.. Cause If im not breathing I would not be able to type this question. Thanks much for any helpHealth Question & Answer
a letter in the mail.. its something bad.. a unpaid bill, a ez-pass violation that i didn't KNOW ABOUT.
I get a call on the phone.. Its some one chewing my @ss for something I didn't do. or someone telling me I have to work for someone else.
i shake. im sleepless.. im a military police officer in the u.s. army.. Any help from a civilian .. advice or such to help me relax.. and don't tell me to breathe.. G.D. I"M TIRED of being told to breathe.. Cause If im not breathing I would not be able to type this question. Thanks much for any helpHealth Question & Answer
Answers:
See anxiety treatments, at ezy build (below) in section 6. Set yourself a specific time period for worrying about anything, (say; around three quarters of an hour, possibly when you get home, or after your evening meal, but not too close to bedtime) after which, resolve firmly to refuse to even entertain the thought of worrying again on that day: realise and accept that to do otherwise would be counterproductive to your mental health, and enjoyment of life.
You will have had your "worry time" for the day, and can just write down any more thoughts that come to mind, and say to yourself: "Well, I'll just have to worry about that tomorrow, won't I.?". It is important to deal with a negative internal monologue (self talk), or mental process, such as disturbing thoughts, or images, by the process of (a): recognising it, and (b): challenging it immediately.
When you notice something negative, such as: "I'm never going to get over this!" or: "Why am I always so pathetic/useless/such a loser.?" or even: "I can't do this/will never get over this!", or a disturbing image, recognise that this is part of the mindset which will hold you back from progress. Having identified and labelled it, visualise a large red "STOP!" sign, and/or possibly a stern faced person wagging an index finger at you in a negative manner, then say to yourself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!"
You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick", instead of "tactic". In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary. Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method.
Practice one of the relaxation methods in sections 2, 11, 2c, or 2i, daily, and when needed. Alternatively, give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. There is also a version for use in public places, (if you like, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind). Section 53, and pages 2, 2.q and 2.o at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris also refer: "Even though I sometimes suffer from anxiety, I deeply and completely accept myself." Neurofeedback treatment for anxiety is increasingly becoming available. Herbal remedies, such as valerian, (which is not recommended for use if depression is also present) passionflower, or St.John's wort, are often effective, but the idea is (as with anxiolytic medication) to use them like water wings, or training wheels on a bicycle, providing initial support, and giving time for other treatments, such as therapy, and relaxation techniques, to take effect.
A variant of EMDR: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety, is shown in section 42, on page i, at ezy-build (view this page!). I have found that the 2 - 3 minutes spent using the EMDR markedly reduces distractions to the relaxation process, and is repaid many times over.
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You will have had your "worry time" for the day, and can just write down any more thoughts that come to mind, and say to yourself: "Well, I'll just have to worry about that tomorrow, won't I.?". It is important to deal with a negative internal monologue (self talk), or mental process, such as disturbing thoughts, or images, by the process of (a): recognising it, and (b): challenging it immediately.
When you notice something negative, such as: "I'm never going to get over this!" or: "Why am I always so pathetic/useless/such a loser.?" or even: "I can't do this/will never get over this!", or a disturbing image, recognise that this is part of the mindset which will hold you back from progress. Having identified and labelled it, visualise a large red "STOP!" sign, and/or possibly a stern faced person wagging an index finger at you in a negative manner, then say to yourself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!"
You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick", instead of "tactic". In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary. Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method.
Practice one of the relaxation methods in sections 2, 11, 2c, or 2i, daily, and when needed. Alternatively, give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. There is also a version for use in public places, (if you like, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind). Section 53, and pages 2, 2.q and 2.o at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris also refer: "Even though I sometimes suffer from anxiety, I deeply and completely accept myself." Neurofeedback treatment for anxiety is increasingly becoming available. Herbal remedies, such as valerian, (which is not recommended for use if depression is also present) passionflower, or St.John's wort, are often effective, but the idea is (as with anxiolytic medication) to use them like water wings, or training wheels on a bicycle, providing initial support, and giving time for other treatments, such as therapy, and relaxation techniques, to take effect.
A variant of EMDR: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety, is shown in section 42, on page i, at ezy-build (view this page!). I have found that the 2 - 3 minutes spent using the EMDR markedly reduces distractions to the relaxation process, and is repaid many times over.
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i would see your doctor and get a referral to see a cbt therapist/counsellor as it does sound like you need it. A cbt therapist helps a person to get alter the way they thinking, negative thoughts to positive thoughts. They also help with obsessions and disorders or any kind.
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i really think you should go and see your doctor. it sounds like your suffering from axiety and they will probably be able to give you drugs to help.Health Question & Answer