My girlfriend cuts, i wanna help her more than i know how to?!
Question: My girlfriend cuts, i wanna help her more than i know how to.?
I dont really know how to go about doing this, im doin it for my girlfriend. This isnt about me, but about my girlfriend!
I myself have cut in the past, so i know how cuttin feels, and i to have my own issues but this isnt for me
My girlfriend who i knew in highschool, but more recently began dating 5 months ago, has had an cutting problem for as long as ive known her, and aparently back before i knew her.
She like most cutters do it to help their emotional venting, and so they dont do worse to themselves. She is on 6 or 7 different meds 2 times a day, She has suicidal tendencies often if she is without her meds for along time, but still cuts when her depression gets worse than normal. She was in the hospital for 9 weeks due to an suicidal overdose on her sleeping meds, while in the hospital she continued to cut regardless if the doctors tried to stop her, she has many scars on her lower arms and lowerr legs, smaller patchs of scar in different areas, but in late 2007 with no other option besides life in a padded room, they performed EST (electro Shock Therapy),The EST gave her short term memory, and some other small side effects, needless to say it didnt stop her, just made her hate herself worse and life. Between that time and around febuary 2008 i dont know much, dont know how bad her issue was, but in febuary 2008 she lost her boyfriend of 5 years to a heart attack, and i guess she relapsed and it began to get much worse.
We have been dating since May 31st, just a short time after her b-day, she was so happy to know how i felt for her regardless of her problems, and it was only shortly before then that i really found out she was cutting herself so much, since she was always covering the scars up. She has always had alot of family related problems, mainly an emotionally and verbally abusinve father, and both her parents treat her like she was a mistake, and their pawn to do everything, and to blame everything on, she is a great person but an entire life of her parents looking down at her, just caused her problems to get worse. She is 25, considered unfit to live on her own, but is now fit to get out on her own away from the source of her issues!
She Believes herself to be unsightly, ugly or whatever, as not many have said she is beautiful and she grew to think she wasnt, I have always seen her as an absolutely beautiful woman, i dont care about her scars except new ones and she knows how i feel, but recently, she started to cut on her wrists again, something i had hoped would be over. over the last few months she only cuts on her arms and upper thigh areas until lately as its getting colder and she can cover the cuts up easier than in summer. I told her that i hurt me alot to see her cutting herself,I stressed very much that i wished for her to stop cutting her wrists or all places, and if it helped just to cut somewhere else if she absolutely had to cut, so far she has stuck by my wish, but i still see fresh cuts on her arms and legs. Every so often she is left without her meds and the cutting gets worse and she gets suicidal and it bothers me, because i could come home and not know for days that she could be dead, and her parents wouldnt care to tell me. My girlfriend is as important to me as my family, and just as id die if my family did, so would i if she died, i cant stand losing her. I am not sure what else i can say, but i need help, need advice to stop her, give her something to take her mind off of it, anything, just the though makes me never want to leave her side, call her every minute to see if she is ok, just, i Love her so much, she is my whole world now, every cut she inflicts, hurts me too, every time she says she has thought about suicide, it makes me fear that i'll lose her, lose the best thing ive ever had in what i concider a tiny little existence.. BTW, My name is Ben, her name is May.Health Question & Answer
I myself have cut in the past, so i know how cuttin feels, and i to have my own issues but this isnt for me
My girlfriend who i knew in highschool, but more recently began dating 5 months ago, has had an cutting problem for as long as ive known her, and aparently back before i knew her.
She like most cutters do it to help their emotional venting, and so they dont do worse to themselves. She is on 6 or 7 different meds 2 times a day, She has suicidal tendencies often if she is without her meds for along time, but still cuts when her depression gets worse than normal. She was in the hospital for 9 weeks due to an suicidal overdose on her sleeping meds, while in the hospital she continued to cut regardless if the doctors tried to stop her, she has many scars on her lower arms and lowerr legs, smaller patchs of scar in different areas, but in late 2007 with no other option besides life in a padded room, they performed EST (electro Shock Therapy),The EST gave her short term memory, and some other small side effects, needless to say it didnt stop her, just made her hate herself worse and life. Between that time and around febuary 2008 i dont know much, dont know how bad her issue was, but in febuary 2008 she lost her boyfriend of 5 years to a heart attack, and i guess she relapsed and it began to get much worse.
We have been dating since May 31st, just a short time after her b-day, she was so happy to know how i felt for her regardless of her problems, and it was only shortly before then that i really found out she was cutting herself so much, since she was always covering the scars up. She has always had alot of family related problems, mainly an emotionally and verbally abusinve father, and both her parents treat her like she was a mistake, and their pawn to do everything, and to blame everything on, she is a great person but an entire life of her parents looking down at her, just caused her problems to get worse. She is 25, considered unfit to live on her own, but is now fit to get out on her own away from the source of her issues!
She Believes herself to be unsightly, ugly or whatever, as not many have said she is beautiful and she grew to think she wasnt, I have always seen her as an absolutely beautiful woman, i dont care about her scars except new ones and she knows how i feel, but recently, she started to cut on her wrists again, something i had hoped would be over. over the last few months she only cuts on her arms and upper thigh areas until lately as its getting colder and she can cover the cuts up easier than in summer. I told her that i hurt me alot to see her cutting herself,I stressed very much that i wished for her to stop cutting her wrists or all places, and if it helped just to cut somewhere else if she absolutely had to cut, so far she has stuck by my wish, but i still see fresh cuts on her arms and legs. Every so often she is left without her meds and the cutting gets worse and she gets suicidal and it bothers me, because i could come home and not know for days that she could be dead, and her parents wouldnt care to tell me. My girlfriend is as important to me as my family, and just as id die if my family did, so would i if she died, i cant stand losing her. I am not sure what else i can say, but i need help, need advice to stop her, give her something to take her mind off of it, anything, just the though makes me never want to leave her side, call her every minute to see if she is ok, just, i Love her so much, she is my whole world now, every cut she inflicts, hurts me too, every time she says she has thought about suicide, it makes me fear that i'll lose her, lose the best thing ive ever had in what i concider a tiny little existence.. BTW, My name is Ben, her name is May.Health Question & Answer
Answers:
Hi Ben,
Have you considered getting her into a rehabilitation center for her cutting.? There's not really much you can do besides that. It sounds as though her mental illnesses are being treated... whether effective or not is a different question. But the main things is, May needs to want to be helped. Whether you believe it or not, her cutting is a choice. If she really wanted to quit, I bet you she could.
also, she just needs to be loved, and you are doing a great job of putting up with her problems. Let's pray you can keep it up. That's another thing... prayer. I don't know whether you believe in 'God' or not... but prayer cannot hurt in this situation.
I am so very sorry for your situation and the challenges you and May are facing. I hope you two the best, and if you have any questions or just want someone to talk to, please IM or email me. =)
Health Question & Answer
Have you considered getting her into a rehabilitation center for her cutting.? There's not really much you can do besides that. It sounds as though her mental illnesses are being treated... whether effective or not is a different question. But the main things is, May needs to want to be helped. Whether you believe it or not, her cutting is a choice. If she really wanted to quit, I bet you she could.
also, she just needs to be loved, and you are doing a great job of putting up with her problems. Let's pray you can keep it up. That's another thing... prayer. I don't know whether you believe in 'God' or not... but prayer cannot hurt in this situation.
I am so very sorry for your situation and the challenges you and May are facing. I hope you two the best, and if you have any questions or just want someone to talk to, please IM or email me. =)
Health Question & Answer