How can you make your partner an affectionate person?!
Question:
When i married him, i thought he will changed. I was wrong. It's been 5 years and he hasn't changed at all. I'm just don't know what to do. I'm just tired of trying and trying. And what is worst he says he doesn't know what to do. Any help will be appreciated
Answers:
You can't change anyone, only they can change themselves. You can however, change how you feel about them. You can just learn to accept his aloofness and you will be more relaxed. Or, you can figure out why you need more affection from him like, were you starved for it as a child or do you want the same level that you are used to?
My suggestion though might help. Get a bowl and a few dozen pieces of paper. Write on those pieces of paper things like;
1 minute hug
2 minutes kissing
10 minutes cuddling
30 minutes one on one talking
and naturally, anything else you require
Have him pull one or more a day, like taking a pill or an lesson, it will help.
Other Answers:
Well why did you marry him then?
You can't change a person to suit your idea of greatness.
Some people are just like that. My husband went to the library and actually checked some books on dating a keeping the romance in the relationship. But my husband was very insecure. Some guys just don't get it.
The funny part is, he would check out the books and never read them.
Have you tried counseling. Sometimes that helps.
Good luck.
Well the first mistake was not accepting him as he was and thinking you could change him. It simply doesn't work that way. Look at how affectionate his family is. The only thing you can do is talk to him about your concerns and let him know how his not being attentive makes you feel. You can't change him. He has got to want to change his self. There could be something in his past that causes him to be this way. Or maybe he simply never experienced a lot of affection through out his life and he simply doesn't know how to express his self. Some people only know how to love so far. After that they get scared and with drawl. So try to work on it together. Good luck
If you are worth appreciating, many men would jump on the opportunity.
Try being the dominant one from now on. He might just like it.
When he gets home, sit on his face and barely give him a chance to breath.
Tell him you are leaving him for Horatio_Alger_69 if he doesn't smarten up.
You can't make anyone something they don't want to be. They have to change themselves, and some people aren't willing to do that. If he isn't then perhaps you should see a marriage counselor.
You can't change him-
if he doesn't know how to give affection he probably never will.
That warning said, I think marriage counseling could help-
maybe he could learn some ways to make you happier and you could find ways to appreciate what he can give you, even if it doesn't seem like enough right now.
Answers: