Can I teach myself to have an orgasm, or are some women just not able to achieve!
Question:
I'm a 45 year old mother of three teenagers. Several years ago I ended a 20 year marriage to a man I learned is gay. Though we didn't have sex after the youngest was born (15 years ago), I never cheated. My husband was emotionally abusive and told me I wasn't worthy of receiving love from anyone.
I recently started dating a wonderful man whom I've known for about nine years. We've spent five or six long afternoons and evenings making love. He's very capable and knows all the right moves. While it's nice to know that I can respond and enjoy sex, I just can't reach an orgasm. I'd like to know what it's supposed to feel like and what I can do to make it happen for me.
Answers:
Yes you can. A woman who cannot is extremely rare. Your biggest problem is to unlearn everything you learned about sex. It is your mental associations that might be standing in your way.
First, you need to learn about your own body and what excites you and what does not. Do this alone. Not with a partner. Many women find the use of a vi-brator useful. Pay attention to any negative thought or emotions that arise. These are your issues. It is most likely your own mind which is preventing you from reaching orgasm. Your mind should be a tool, not a taskmaster. Allow your body to take control, occupy your mind with suitable thoughts, not negative ones.
Believe me, you will know it once you experience it.
Once you have experienced what your are looking for, then it is time to get your partner involved. (This is not to say that you cannot have your afternoon and evening sessions also before this time). Learn how to communicate during the act, either verbally or with motions. You might even try being in the upper position for better control.
Hope this helps.
Other Answers:
Get a porn movie and watch it and then attack your man when he comes home. The rest will happen if he is a good lover . Better yet watch it with him and he will make sure you have an orgasm!
yes u can teach urself to orgasm.. play around and see what feels the best ..but ur going to have to learn to enjoy sex and ur sexuality.. u have to be comfortable with urself and relaxed completely not trying to hard.. just relax and enjoy the feeling and it will happen ..relaxing is the biggest key
hey maybe watch a dirty movie and get turn on and work the middle finger in the right place.
Try to have him stimulate your clitoris and maybe use a vibrator to rub your clitoris while his penis thrusting up in your vagina. That should help, or you can see a sex therapist that can walk you through it. I know that seems personal but it may help you. Sorry if I was too graphic but I don't beat around the bush.
Source(s):
I have been through that and it helped me.
You have to free your mind first. Usually, when a woman denies herself the pleasure of an orgasm, it's because she feels that she is not worthy of it or that it is somehow wrong to have one and is feeling guilty about it. Try to resolve your issues first. You mentioned that you have never cheated even if you found out your husband was gay. Perhaps it is your sense of loyalty to the marriage (and not to your gay partner) that is holding you back.
it takes practice.lots of practice
try lots of different things! use your imagination! experiment! it took me a while but what did it is a toy called the silver bullet. every woman is different so you have to find what you like and gets lots of it. also for me it took more than casual sex. i needed that whole feeling of love and lots of emotions from both people. try it alone 1st then get help from someone who really wants to make it happen for you.
Have You ever heard of "kiegel exercises" Works great feels good and you can do em anywhere and everywhere! ;)
check this link for further info. G.L
Source(s):
http://www.everyday-miracles.com/Rarticle2.htm
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