So angry i would kill someone!!HELP!>?!
Question: So angry i would kill someone!!HELP!>.?
well i never actually wanted to kill someone but ive been really angry lately
well heres the story:
so i guess ive always been angry, like when i was younger i would throw temper tantrums like i thought that was pretty normal, btw, im 17 now. but for the past year and a half ive been extra angry. its kinda cuz i feel betrayed from some things that have happend in the past. i've been trying not to lash out and say stuff that i regret when i get mad, but i end up saying i deserve to be mad right now and i end up saying stuff and then afterwards i just start to cry cuz i feel so stupid for what i said and because im embarassed. i used to throw stuff and hit things/people but ive been trying so hard not to, and i havnt been for a couple of years now. some days i can control my anger but others i yell at the top of my lungs, sometimes i yell so loud i start to cry, clench my fists and tense my leg muscles and sometimes i stomp my feet while i walk away and its only at my closest family members. then afterwards i feel so tired and sometimes i cry; and for some reason when other people do things that annoy me, it doesnt get me angry, its kinda like a oh thats kinda annoying but literally two seconds later im just like whatever. but if one of my family does it i get so mad.
sorry for how long that was but i guess what i want to ask is how can i control myself and if you think im too angry and if anyone else gets really mad kinda like how i do. i kinda dont deny that i might have a anger problem but im afraid of doctors cuz of things that have happend and idk, thanks for reading, hopefully youll comment and help me, i dont want this to ruin my life completly.Health Question & Answer
well heres the story:
so i guess ive always been angry, like when i was younger i would throw temper tantrums like i thought that was pretty normal, btw, im 17 now. but for the past year and a half ive been extra angry. its kinda cuz i feel betrayed from some things that have happend in the past. i've been trying not to lash out and say stuff that i regret when i get mad, but i end up saying i deserve to be mad right now and i end up saying stuff and then afterwards i just start to cry cuz i feel so stupid for what i said and because im embarassed. i used to throw stuff and hit things/people but ive been trying so hard not to, and i havnt been for a couple of years now. some days i can control my anger but others i yell at the top of my lungs, sometimes i yell so loud i start to cry, clench my fists and tense my leg muscles and sometimes i stomp my feet while i walk away and its only at my closest family members. then afterwards i feel so tired and sometimes i cry; and for some reason when other people do things that annoy me, it doesnt get me angry, its kinda like a oh thats kinda annoying but literally two seconds later im just like whatever. but if one of my family does it i get so mad.
sorry for how long that was but i guess what i want to ask is how can i control myself and if you think im too angry and if anyone else gets really mad kinda like how i do. i kinda dont deny that i might have a anger problem but im afraid of doctors cuz of things that have happend and idk, thanks for reading, hopefully youll comment and help me, i dont want this to ruin my life completly.Health Question & Answer
Answers:
I've been there myself. I'm quite a bit older now. To some degree I think this is normal at your age. What I found is that I would get really angry because I could not express myself clearly. When something would upset me, I would lose the ability to control my thought process and I couldn't explain how I was feeling. Then I would get more upset at myself for not being able to calm down and be coherent.
You get a much different perspective on things when you get older and you calm that knee-jerk reaction you have to get angry. I found that writing my thoughts helped to calm me down and yet I was able to explain how I was feeling. This works good when you are in an argument with friends or family. Just tell them that you need some time to think about what was said. Then go start writing your thoughts and feelings. When you are done, read over what you wrote. You don't even have to let anyone read it. Treat it like a diary. But often times, I used what I wrote as a letter to the person I was having a problem with. Just be sure that you read over the letter a few times and give yourself plenty of time to calm down before you make a final decision on letting someone see your writing. People tend to take the written form to me much more literal and don't allow as much interpretation. In other words, if you write "I hate you", and you give the letter to someone, they will always have that and bring it up. I guess I'm saying just be careful with who sees it.
If nothing else, it can just serve as a tool to remind you of how upset you were about something. After you have calmed down and then you read over your writing, you may realize... Wow, I was upset about THAT!.?!.?!.? Or... you read over it and say Wow!, that person really upset me and I need to let them know about it. But now you are calm and now you can go talk to the person without your anger choking you up.
hope it helps.
Health Question & Answer
You get a much different perspective on things when you get older and you calm that knee-jerk reaction you have to get angry. I found that writing my thoughts helped to calm me down and yet I was able to explain how I was feeling. This works good when you are in an argument with friends or family. Just tell them that you need some time to think about what was said. Then go start writing your thoughts and feelings. When you are done, read over what you wrote. You don't even have to let anyone read it. Treat it like a diary. But often times, I used what I wrote as a letter to the person I was having a problem with. Just be sure that you read over the letter a few times and give yourself plenty of time to calm down before you make a final decision on letting someone see your writing. People tend to take the written form to me much more literal and don't allow as much interpretation. In other words, if you write "I hate you", and you give the letter to someone, they will always have that and bring it up. I guess I'm saying just be careful with who sees it.
If nothing else, it can just serve as a tool to remind you of how upset you were about something. After you have calmed down and then you read over your writing, you may realize... Wow, I was upset about THAT!.?!.?!.? Or... you read over it and say Wow!, that person really upset me and I need to let them know about it. But now you are calm and now you can go talk to the person without your anger choking you up.
hope it helps.
Health Question & Answer
try to see a phsycotrist.. ( not right spelling i know)Health Question & Answer
Well I used to let everything bother me deeply. I think you have to ask yourself this when someone says something that sets you off....How important is this in the bigger scheme of things.? Really, is it worth a minute of freaking out,,,two hours, five day etc... How important is it really.? Ok so someone cuts you off in traffic, do you flip him off, chase him down and stomp the heck out of him..? NO because what does it really matter.? What.? SO the jerk get to his destination one minute early,,,so whos the jerk.? The one who is sitting in jail for battering someone or the one who cuts you off.? If you don't find ways to cope with your anger you might ruin your life by acting on impulse.? So you get mad, you throw something at the wall but it richochettes and hits your mom or later on in life, your kid and it kills them...hmmm so this anger just is not worth keeping..NOW i believe that when your family says something you feel that they are attacking you. Well, if they are you need to ask yourself...is what they are saying to you really true.? Are they saying it in malice.? What is their real motive...not what is it that I THINK they mean but what is it they are really saying to you.
I know that my husband is the youngest boy of 7 kids all boys but one. He always thinks that people are picking on him. because he was the youngest, his brothers DID pick on him alot. They are all adults now and don't pick on each other but he still thinks people pick on him. Not only his family but people at work and anyone actually. He has a huge chip on his shoulder. SO, heres the thing, you must want to change this or you wouldn't be seeking help on this site. If people piss you off, you need to find a way to quickly decide if it is worth reacting poorly. Consider the source, consider what they are really saying. If they are being judgemental try to be the bigger person. Sometimes if you can say...I am not going to buy in to this,,, I am not going to let this petty comment piss me off. Then walk away. It isn't necessary to give the issue any life. Eventually people will stop trying to antagonize you when they see you aren't reacting like they want. I was also quick to anger and get pissed off. Sometimes I still do, but it is mostly when people start being negative and hard upon themselves...like when my husband gets into his negative mode...You know what I do.? I just stop talking , I refuse to give his negativity Life.. WHen you react poorly you are making what they say to you Important. If you walk away without reacting you are killing their attack upon you. Pretty soon when you start ignoring their attacks or insults what they say will seem less important and you will think hmmm, How childish they are being..you will have grown and matured and they will be on a lower level than you...You will have evolved into a more calm person. The only things that can bother you are those things that you allow to bother you. Good Luck and it is never a bad idea to seek councel. Maybe at school if not , the doctors... Peace To you....Health Question & Answer
I know that my husband is the youngest boy of 7 kids all boys but one. He always thinks that people are picking on him. because he was the youngest, his brothers DID pick on him alot. They are all adults now and don't pick on each other but he still thinks people pick on him. Not only his family but people at work and anyone actually. He has a huge chip on his shoulder. SO, heres the thing, you must want to change this or you wouldn't be seeking help on this site. If people piss you off, you need to find a way to quickly decide if it is worth reacting poorly. Consider the source, consider what they are really saying. If they are being judgemental try to be the bigger person. Sometimes if you can say...I am not going to buy in to this,,, I am not going to let this petty comment piss me off. Then walk away. It isn't necessary to give the issue any life. Eventually people will stop trying to antagonize you when they see you aren't reacting like they want. I was also quick to anger and get pissed off. Sometimes I still do, but it is mostly when people start being negative and hard upon themselves...like when my husband gets into his negative mode...You know what I do.? I just stop talking , I refuse to give his negativity Life.. WHen you react poorly you are making what they say to you Important. If you walk away without reacting you are killing their attack upon you. Pretty soon when you start ignoring their attacks or insults what they say will seem less important and you will think hmmm, How childish they are being..you will have grown and matured and they will be on a lower level than you...You will have evolved into a more calm person. The only things that can bother you are those things that you allow to bother you. Good Luck and it is never a bad idea to seek councel. Maybe at school if not , the doctors... Peace To you....Health Question & Answer
You definitely have anger issues and other issues as well. I recommend that you get some counseling. I also recommend that you take some classes that are physically challenging, such as karate, boxing, softball, tennis, anything where you can release that negative energy. Even going to a batting range and hit balls until your exhausted. Every time you strike one hard, say this ones for you ------. You will learn how to rid yourself of all the negative and replace it with positive. You'll feel better and be able to create a new relationship with your family. Health Question & Answer
Sounds like you need an outlet for that anger. There's two that i can think of. First, a therapist to talk to about the things that are making you angry. Deal with them! Then you can let them go and move on. Second, exercise. Something like boxing or a punching bag, or running til you can't run anymore. Sometimes you can get rid of aggression through physical exercise. I have friends who need to get their stress out physically like that in order to let go of it. You should still try to figure out what it is that makes you stressed and deal with it, but the physical exercise can help too.Health Question & Answer