Ugh.. There is a cucumber lodged in my anus .. wtf do i do?!
Question: Ugh.. There is a cucumber lodged in my anus .. wtf do i do.?
Me and my girlfriend wher experementing with.. "Things." And next thing i know theres a cucumber in my ***, and i cant pull it out, tried laxatives, tried everything i could think of Please dont laugh to hard xDHealth Question & Answer
Answers:
I'm assuming it's a whole cucumber and not one sliced in half so it has a flat end wedging it in there. If you can get it in then you can get it out. Laxatives won't work very well. You neglected to say how long its been in there.
For something like this it could take up to 6-7 days for your body to shift it. This is okay as your body will be trying to digest it and it'll soften somewhat making it easier when the time comes.
When you feel like you need to move your bowels you should go to the bathroom and take a book or computer game and stay there perhaps at least 10 minutes and don't try too hard to push it out. Your anus will gradually start to relax while sitting there and it'll slowly start to dilate and the cucumber should be slowly pushed out. If it doesn't work the first time just keep doing the same thing each time you feel you need to use the bathroon. Relaxing the anus and giving it time while sitting there is the key to success.
Thank God you're not kinky for pineapple!
Have you learned anything from this.?Health Question & Answer
For something like this it could take up to 6-7 days for your body to shift it. This is okay as your body will be trying to digest it and it'll soften somewhat making it easier when the time comes.
When you feel like you need to move your bowels you should go to the bathroom and take a book or computer game and stay there perhaps at least 10 minutes and don't try too hard to push it out. Your anus will gradually start to relax while sitting there and it'll slowly start to dilate and the cucumber should be slowly pushed out. If it doesn't work the first time just keep doing the same thing each time you feel you need to use the bathroon. Relaxing the anus and giving it time while sitting there is the key to success.
Thank God you're not kinky for pineapple!
Have you learned anything from this.?Health Question & Answer
You have a cucumber up your butt and you are sitting there typing on the computer.? are you fooling around with this guy.?
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Wow.....a half hour ago you said that your girlfriend wouldn't have sex with you because of your 13 inch penis. I guess things changed, huh.?
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Get to the ER...don't mess with it at home.
You'll be surprised that the ER would not be shocked
because this is more common than you think. Health Question & Answer
You'll be surprised that the ER would not be shocked
because this is more common than you think. Health Question & Answer
AH HA u are a funny character guess push harder it pop out sooner or later Health Question & Answer
Is this where the term "tossing salad" comes from.?Health Question & Answer
GO TO THE E.R.Health Question & Answer
Get your Girlfriend to fist you & get it out that wayHealth Question & Answer
wtf the ER duhHealth Question & Answer
You'd be a real shmuck not to go to the E.R.... Health Question & Answer
this so made my mornin maybe puttin yo fingers up ya a@# and pullin it outHealth Question & Answer